12 Being Vulnerable
by A Person Who Likes Comedy
Summary: Rated T for attempted suicide. FanKyle


"_Loooser~"_

"_Haha he's so ugly!"_

"_Stupid winch!"_

"_No one wants you here!"_

"_You're so pathetic." _

Kyle walked down the school hallways, eyes downcast. He tried hard not to meet the eyes of others and provoke them once again to yell at him. He tightened his arms around his books, biting his lip to keep his tears in.

He was strong. He wouldn't cry. He wouldn't give them the satisfaction of it.

So why was he in the bathroom sobbing?

Maybe he should just end this.

* * *

"Looks like we win!" Duke smirked, baseball bat over his shoulder. Kyle panted, glaring at him through narrowed eyes. It hurt, oh god how it hurt. He was in so much pain he could barely stand it. His left temple was currently oozing blood, making it hard to understand what the thugs in front of him were saying.

But one thing was clear.

They lost.

And it was all his fault.

_Again. _

Kyle clenched and unclenched his hands, his scarlet bangs covering his tear stained eyes. He couldn't cry, not yet at least. Just a little while longer, when he's alone. That's when it always happened.

"Haha losers! Maybe you should stop trying when you know you are going to get beat so bad." The girl snickered along with her other friends, soon guffawing as if it was hilarious. Fanboy, Yo, Chum Chum, and Kyle remained silent, all panting from exhaustion. Fanboy was shaking with anger, Kyle could see he wanted to knock them out. He was so humiliated. The thugs soon left, leaving all of them in silence.

Every night those thugs from the other side of town come and pick a fight, just because they know Fanboy will. Kyle couldn't stand the fighting; he was too weak. He was pitiful.

"I'm so sorry-" Kyle began softly, once again apologizing for losing.

"You're always sorry!" Fanboy exploded, turning on him with vibrant emerald eyes. Kyle stared at him in shock, startled by his coldness towards him. Fanboy looked downright furious, making Kyle slightly scared.

"But it doesn't matter! It never does! You're so weak it's not even funny! I don't know why I hang out with you-" Fanboy froze in his sudden rant, eyes wide in shock as he slowly turned to face Kyle. Kyle's doe brown eyes were huge, hurt evident in them as tears pooled in his eyes. Fanboy slowly took a step forward, ready to apologize for blowing up, but it was too late.

Kyle's bangs covered his tear stained eyes as he smiled weakly at them, trying to hide his trembling.

"I-I understand." Kyle said with a strong-_fake_-voice, clutching his book tightly to keep himself composed.

"No Kyle I didn't mean-"

"No Fanboy, it's okay." Kyle said softly, his eyes still hidden as he stared at the ground. He let out a bitter laugh, striking their hearts. "I mean, let's face it, who was I kidding? You guys are the strongest team and I'm just a deadweight. I understand, it's okay." Kyle said with an even tone, the smile on his face bringing them all dread. Kyle took a step back, his bangs moving enough to let them see his eyes.

His pained eyes.

"Kyle...please.." Fanboy pleaded, taking another step forward as Kyle took one back. Kyle finally turned to stare Fanboy dead in the eyes, his tears vanished as did the pained, heartbreaking look.

"It's okay Fanboy, you don't have to pretend to be my friend anymore. It'd just be better if I was dead." Kyle whispered the end, turning around and running away from them. Fanboy screamed for Kyle to come back, trying to chase him only to be met with a hand to the cheek.

"What the hell?" Yo screamed at him, her own tears in her eye. Fanboy stared in shock at the great girl before him, reduced to tears.

"How could you say something like that to him?!" Yo fumed before running off also, wiping her glasses clear of the fog. Chum Chum just gave Fanboy a very disappointed look before walking off himself, hands in his pockets.

Fanboy, reduced to his knees, thought of what he had just done. He was the worst best friend ever-he couldn't even call himself that anymore.

"I'm sorry..."

* * *

Kyle continued to stare lifelessly at the picture in his hands, trying to find something that wasn't there. The boy in a soccer uniform had his arm around Kyle's shoulder, his bright grin on his face along with a slight blush-if you looked close enough. Kyle slowly put it down before turning around, about to walk to his bed and retire for the night when he heard a loud crashing noise.

Kyle turned back to see the picture now on the ground on it's front. Panicked, Kyle went to pick it up only to be met with a searing pain. He instantly brought his thumb up to his mouth, sucking the blood and whimpering.

_I'm so pathetic, why would I even think for a minute that he might... Kyle_ felt a warm liquid falling down his cheeks. He brought his hand up to quickly wipe the tears away, biting his lip.

He could do it. He could end it right here. Oh how he wanted to. He just wanted the pain to go away. He couldn't take it anymore...his heart...

Kyle Bloodworth Thomason had been contemplating suicide for a month now. He didn't know when or why the thought appeared to him, it just had. And in the past couple months, he thought it'd be the best way to get out of things.

But Kyle wasn't weak. Well, at least he _hadn't _thought that, until now. He truly was weak. But did he want to end his life?

He had been hesitant before, for the sake of his friends and peers. But...Fanboy had made it clear that they didn't want a nuisance around. That was the last straw for Kyle's sanity. He couldn't take being alone, it was one of his biggest fears.

So without hesitation, he picked up one of the glass shards and brushed it against his skin, watching as it slowly tore his skin open, blood seeping through the cuts.

_I'm sorry. _Was all Kyle could think before he hit the floor.

* * *

"Oh god no! God please! Please!" Fanboy cried, carrying Kyle in his arms through downtown traffic. Tears were unwillingly flooding his cheeks as he screamed and cursed, begging for Kyle to be okay.

"Please don't let Kyle die!" Fanboy yelled to an unknown force as he rammed through the people, hoping to get to the hospital soon. Onlookers gasped in horror once they saw Kyle's bloodied striped sweater, his wrist tucked into Fanboy's chest carefully. Once he saw the big white building he automatically ran faster, his tears stinging as they hit the cold air.

"You're gonna be okay Kyle, you're gonna be okay.." Fanboy whispered, more to himself. He was on the brink of insanity, seeing Kyle collapsed on the floor with blood trickling out of his wrist was hell. He was breathing heavily as he shouted for help, doctors seeing the boy in his arm came to his side and put him on a gurney.

Kyle stared lifelessly at Fanboy as he was wheeled away, making eye contact with him for one second.

_"Fanboy..."_

* * *

Kyle's eyes flickered open, stretching his arms out with a yawn. He blinked a couple of times only to be startled by a pair of eyes right in his face, blinking twice before someone pulled him into a warm embrace.

Kyle gasped in surprise, realizing who it was.

He remained silent, not knowing what to say at all.

"How could you do that?" Fanboy asked, his voice cracking. Kyle looked down in shame, staring at his bandaged wrists. He had actually done it? And wasn't dead?

"I can't take it anymore.." Kyle's voice was filled with bubbling anxiety as her body stiffened. Natsu searched her eyes, trying to find the boy he always knew.

"How could you? After she did it, now you will?" Fanboy demanded, tears in his eyes again. Kyle winced, suddenly realizing who he was talking about.

Ten years ago Fanboy's own mother committed suicide, soon after his father left him. He was left all alone but still made it, he was so strong. Kyle felt worse, remembering how distraught he had been after his mother had taken her life. He didn't know why he wanted to, he had felt trapped.

"Fanb-"

"WHY? YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?" Fanboy yelled in Kyle's face before calming down, shrinking away and hiding beneath his bangs. Kyle sat, stunned. He bit his lip, a choked sob coming out of him. He cried into his hands, shaking slightly.

"God damn it Fanboy! I can't take it anymore! I can't!" Kyle screamed, his chest tightening in panic. He thrashed around in bed before being suddenly halted, warm arms wrapped around him, stunning him.

"You don't have to Kyle." Fanboy whispered softly into Kyle's ear, rubbing his back comfortingly. Kyle felt something wet on his shoulder, shocked to see Fanboy crying.

"Please don't ever that again Kyle...I can't lose you." Fanboy pleaded quietly. Kyle sat stiffly.

"I'm such a burden, I don't want to-"

"Kyle! You aren't a burden at all, I was just angry at myself for not being able to protect you from that blow. I'm sorry I'm so sorry." Fanboy's chest tightened as he darkened slightly. He suddenly felt warm arms wrap around him, a soft voice whispering lovingly to him.

"I'm sorry Fanboy, I really am." Kyle's voice. So vulnerable, so heartbreaking. And what could he do? Nothing. He felt his heart breaking, not being able to protect the one you loved was truly terrible.

Fanboy kissed Kyle long, making sure to convert all the love he had been penting up convey into that one kiss. He needed Kyle so bad. He couldn't leave him ever again, he barely made it through this time.

"I love you so much." He whispered to her, wiping Kyle's tears away.

* * *

**This is the first time I've ever almost cried writing a fanfiction.**

**I was strongly against making a suicide story but I just needed to get my pent up sadness out(from reading a tragic story).**

**I'm sorry if you didn't like this, but I wanted to write it. **

***sigh* Only 88 more fanfics to go...**

**Please review, thanks.**


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